


Avon Inferred

by Willa Shakespeare (AnonEhouse)



Category: Blake's 7
Genre: Alternate Universe, Crack, F/M, M/M, Post Gauda Prime
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-02
Updated: 2013-01-02
Packaged: 2017-11-23 10:08:19
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,701
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/620943
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnonEhouse/pseuds/Willa%20Shakespeare
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Cracky smut. The major character deaths don't involve the listed characters, and all take place off-stage (3 are canonical, anyway). Things, and people, aren't always what they seem.</p><p>At the end of the series, it looks like all the heroes are dead. Nah. (one of many many of my ideas, in varying degrees of seriousness, for DENYING the end of Blake's 7. It's a wonderful ending. If it hadn't upset me so much I'd have never got actively into fandom, or writing fic.) So, you know, this is weird, but it's cheerful, I think.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Avon Inferred

(If you are reading this on any PAY site this is a STOLEN WORK, the author has NOT Given Permission for it to be here. If you're paying to read it, you're being cheated too because you can read it on Archiveofourown for FREE.)

Vila felt something smash into his stomach, knocking the breath out of him and flinging him onto the floor. For several minutes he couldn't breathe, he couldn't move, he couldn't do anything but lie there and panic as the people who made up most of his personal universe were slaughtered all around him. He couldn't even spare them a thought as his entire being was taken up with the horror of suffocation, but just before he lost consciousness his muscles unlocked and he dragged in one huge, sobbing breath.

No one noticed the noise because right at that instant all the troopers started firing at Avon. Vila stared, light-headed, as Avon gave one of his creepier smiles, threw the gun at them and then blurred... well, that was the best way Vila could describe it, as Avon moved so quickly, leaping from trooper to trooper, slicing at them with his hands, kicking with his feet, suddenly much more graceful than Vila had ever seen him. Avon lounged with seductive ease, and stalked impressively, but his running had always been awkward. Maybe Avon was doing better now because he was on all fours... wait... oh, all right. Vila relaxed. This was all delirium caused by oxygen starvation to the brain as he died. At least the troopers had managed it without pain. Vila felt rather grateful for that as he saw Servalan slink into the room, and heard her spit something venomous at Avon while pointing at Blake's body, but he couldn't make out Avon's response as it was getting to be much too much like work staying awake.

***

"Vila," Avon said softly, and Vila awoke in a panic.

"No, it's not fair! Not you lot for eternity!" Vila complained, opening his eyes to see the flight deck of a pursuit ship with Avon looking down at him and Blake standing behind him, looking rather hangdog. "Where's the virgins in red fur uniforms?" 

"You're not dead, Vila," came another voice. Vila considered fainting again, as another ghost came out of the past. "I'm afraid your other friends did die, but I was able to save you with a telekinetic push."

"Cally, now I _know_ I'm dead!" Vila moaned and cringed back in the really surprisingly comfortable command chair. He felt bad about Soolin and Dayna, and even Tarrant, who had become almost friendly towards the end, but when you got right down to it, Vila was _here_ and they weren't and that was all he could think about at the moment. Like when Cally died... Vila put his hands over his eyes, so he didn't have to look at her, then peeked out again to see if she was still there.

Avon frowned at Cally. "That was not very helpful." He turned back to Vila. "Cally did _not_ die on Terminal. She found Blake in the basement, and we decided that it would be better if she stayed to watch over him while he finished healing. I was to send word to Avalon to pick them up the moment I was able to repair Orac. The main entrance collapsed, yes, but nothing inside was seriously damaged and Servalan had another exit, as I knew she would."

"You knew?" Vila asked, not really believing any of this, but if he was in Hell, listening to Avon lecture was better than being stabbed in the rump by demons wielding red-hot pokers. Marginally.

"Servalan and I were very much alike. We always understood each other. Right up to the end." Avon waved off to the back of the flight deck, and Vila flinched, seeing the stiff-looking pile of black feathers and satin. 

"What! Why did you bring her corpse! I _hope_ it's her corpse!" Vila drew up his feet, and curled into an even tighter unhappy ball.

Blake nodded. "Quite dead," he growled. "And it took Avon long enough to do it."

Avon lifted his lip in one of his not-smiles. "She was _your_ assignment first. At least _I_ wasn't playing dead on Gauda Prime."

Blake growled again and started forward, but Cally put a hand on his collar. She said, "Servalan is dead now, what else matters?" She rubbed Blake's ears and kissed him while Vila watched, open-mouthed.

After a moment of bemused voyeurism, Vila glanced at Avon, who was apparently bored by the sight of his two former lovers (years ago Vila had deduced that from the late-night back and forths on Liberator) going at each other. "Um. Assignment?" Vila asked, focusing on one of the many things that didn't make sense.

Avon leaned forward to rub his cheek against Vila's, which startled Vila into silence as Avon said, "Blake was sent from his home world to retrieve Servalan, who came from _my_ home world. Our allied planets have been observing humans for millennia, but of late it's become more difficult and dangerous to insert our usual agents, and we were finally forced to seek recruits among our higher echelons. Sensibly enough, very few people on that level wanted to give up luxuries and comforts for the danger, insanity and worst of all, inconvenience, of humanity. So when Servalan volunteered, no one bothered to ask why.... Vila, you're not listening."

"You and Blake aren't human?" Vila was getting even more nervous. He wasn't particularly surprised to hear that Servalan had been an alien.

"Not remotely human, for which I gave thanks every day that I lived among you, trying to track down Servalan _and_ Blake, after we gave up hope of either one of them returning."

"But you _look_ human."

Avon shook his head. "Actually, no. You remember the detector shield I designed for Liberator, which made the ship appear to be whatever we chose, or nothing at all, to other systems? Well, we have a biomechanical implant that does the same for us, disguising us against all human senses." Avon leaned forward again, nuzzling under Vila's chin.

Vila squirmed away, suddenly remembered his 'hallucination'- maybe Avon's implant had gone on the fritz during the battle. "You're a hairy alien! Don't touch me!"

Avon was annoyed. "Blake is a hairy alien, too, and you don't see that putting Cally off, do you?" By this time Blake had undone his trousers and Cally had removed her trousers entirely and was sitting vigorously on him on one of the comfortable chairs. Vila goggled, while Avon said, "It was difficult to repress our sexuality, but expressing it stood too great a chance of exposure."

"What about Cally then?"

"She found out about us very quickly, but agreed that we were united in our goal of removing Servalan before she destroyed humanity entirely. She _helped_ Blake out from time to time. As Blake helped me, from time to time."

"You and Cally didn't...?"

"She wouldn't have enjoyed it." 

"Then what makes you think _I_ would? I'm not doing _anything_ until I see what you really are."

"Oh, all right. Blake." Avon got up, went over to the squirming pair and nudged Blake in the ribs. "Turn off your disguise, Blake." He had to raise his voice and repeat it several times before Blake blinked and nodded, then went through some odd motions of the head and neck that were impossible for a human. There was a soft click. 

Vila didn't notice any immediate change. From the back, from Vila's point of view, Blake was still a big man with curly hair, dressed in a grubby bounty hunter's costume. Then Blake turned his head, and Vila saw that the curly brown _fur_ covered Blake's face, including his floppy ears, all except for his melancholy brown eyes and his shiny, wet-looking black nose. Blake's long pink tongue lolled out and he gave Vila a grin that was all the more spooky for still being recognizable, then returned his attention to licking Cally's face.

There was another click behind him. Vila didn't want to look, having no desire to see Avon as a dog- probably one of those vicious guard animals some of the wealthy Alphas still kept. "Vila?" - Avon's voice, as soft and smooth as on Egrorian's shuttle. Vila still didn't turn, not even when pieces of studded black leather began flying over his shoulders to flop to the deck in front of him. Avon came up close behind him, all warm & wiry muscle underneath soft fur, rubbing something... well _something_ large and hard up against Vila's thigh, and Vila still didn't move. 

Then something else tickled Vila's ear and he jumped away and turned to face Avon despite himself and stared. Vila supposed he should have guessed from Avon's dislike of water and cold and dirt that he wasn't a dog. Actually, as hairy aliens went...Vila thought the whiskers were rather stylish, and the large, round golden eyes and pink nose were attractive in a unique sort of way. The reddish-orange striped pelt would be fun to run your fingers through, and the prehensile tail tip that stroked gently along Vila's forearm could certainly be useful. He began to cheer up until he looked further down to see what had been prodding him in the back.

"Oh, NO, you don't!" Vila said, staring with horror at Avon's _something_. The bright red color didn't bother Vila, or the size and shape, which weren't much different from what he'd guessed from the bulges in Avon's red leather trousers, but the _spiky_ bits...

Avon looked down at himself and grinned, showing sharper teeth than ever before, but with the same familiar gap at the one side. "I told you Servalan and I had much in common." He knelt, facing away from Vila, and his tail lashed once, then jerked stiffly to the side, exposing one of the few hairless parts of his body. "Neither of us like barbs."

"Oh, well," Vila said, as he began taking off his clothes. "It may not be a uniform, but at least I got my red fur... in the end."


End file.
